6 Red Flags to Consider Before Marriage: Should I Marry?
It may be the last thing on your mind, but before you tie the knot, you should always take a step back and judge with a clear mind to set yourself up for success. If your partner has already demonstrated some red flags before marriage, you may want to reconsider, or at least address the issues.
Below, we discuss a few of the warning signs that may indicate you might be in an unhealthy relationship. These are useful to help prevent the difficulties of a failed marriage.
Red Flag One: Friends and Family Disapprove
One common red flag is if your friends and family think that you shouldn’t marry your partner. Of course, at the end of the day, it is your decision, but the people around you may have perspective and experience that you lack. It’s good to listen to their feedback, especially when the stakes are so high.
Red Flag Two: No Social Presence
Another red flag is if your partner doesn’t seem to have any strong social connections of their own. Especially if they seem sneaky or covert, you’ll want to make sure that your partner isn’t hiding an unflattering past, and hasn’t already destroyed past relationships.
Red Flag Three: Family Pressures
Though on the one hand it is a good sign if your family approves of and is willing to support your marriage, that support can sometimes turn into pressure and become unhealthy. You should never get married just because, or primarily because your family wants you to, and the same goes for your partner.
Red Flag Four: Previous Marriages
Though about 50% of all marriages end in divorce, second marriages are even more likely, around 65%, to lead to divorce. This is for a number of reasons, and becomes especially likely if there are children from a previous marriage or high-maintenance ex-spouses in the picture.
Red Flag Five: Trust Issues
If your partner is overly possessive, or seems not to trust you, there is no reason to think marriage will change their unhealthy habits. Especially if they excessively keep tabs on your location, or demand to go through your phone. This is a red flag.
Red Flag Six: Intuition
Sometimes, even if you can’t quite put your finger on why, you will have a hesitation or an intuition that your marriage will not be successful. You should pay attention to this feeling, and if it doesn’t go away it might mean that you shouldn’t marry your partner.
Considering these Red Flags, Should I Marry This Person?
Of course marriage is a hugely important decision, and the fact that so many people get divorced is a sign that it is also a difficult one. Before getting married, ask yourself this:
- How do my friends and family feel about this person?
- What are this person’s friends and family like?
- Has this person been married before?
- Can I trust them, and do they trust me?
Ignore the Red Flags? Considering Divorce?
If you’re already married and realize that you and your partner are not as compatible as you once thought, it might be time to consider divorce. Our team at Hart Ginney is ready to help you navigate the legal and relational difficulties that come with a divorce.
Reach out to us today to set up a consultation and find out how we can help you.
1939 Harrison Street, Suite 210
Oakland, CA 94612